Happy Thanksgiving. I am still at CPMC and getting used to my schedule here. I am now able to sometimes walk to the NICU to deliver my growing breast milk. Unable to hold or soothe him, this feels like the one thing I can do to nurture Miles.
I felt disconnected from any celebration after 7 days in the hospital. The outside world, including the attacks in Mumbai, feel completely removed from our new reality. My days are spent attempting pumping, waiting for Dave's visits, talking to family, receiving visits from the slew of lactation consultants, social workers, birth certificates and changing guard of nurses popping in to deliver drugs, check my incision and take my temperature and blood pressure and walking/taking the wheel chair the short distance to the NICU. My hormones are in full swing, reducing me to tears at a moments notice, usually after seeing Miles and feeling helpless in making him better.
Still, we are thankful for what we do have and that our son is as strong as he is for 30 weeks gestation. We celebrated with a steak dinner , courtesy of CPMC and for me, a half glass of wine (one small guilt-free benefit of no longer being pregnant).
I felt disconnected from any celebration after 7 days in the hospital. The outside world, including the attacks in Mumbai, feel completely removed from our new reality. My days are spent attempting pumping, waiting for Dave's visits, talking to family, receiving visits from the slew of lactation consultants, social workers, birth certificates and changing guard of nurses popping in to deliver drugs, check my incision and take my temperature and blood pressure and walking/taking the wheel chair the short distance to the NICU. My hormones are in full swing, reducing me to tears at a moments notice, usually after seeing Miles and feeling helpless in making him better.
Still, we are thankful for what we do have and that our son is as strong as he is for 30 weeks gestation. We celebrated with a steak dinner , courtesy of CPMC and for me, a half glass of wine (one small guilt-free benefit of no longer being pregnant).
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